Today I found myself doodling on a piece of paper... again. I find myself doing this often. Anytime there is an extra piece of paper and a pen lying around, I'm bound to use it. I'm famous for drawing flowers, stars and the occasional squiggly thingy but every once in a while I branch out to try new things. Sometimes I stray from my norms to draw a heart. Well, I try anyway. Tonight was a heart-doodling-attempting kind of night. As I was drawing these hearts, only half way successfully, I was getting a little annoyed with myself. I could feel the stares of my parents' eyes as they watched me silently struggle. I looked up at them and exclaimed, "I'm on a quest to draw the perfect heart! I can only ever seem to get half of it looking decent!" They laughed a little, shrugged their shoulders and continued on in their conversation that I wasn't listening to. I then started to think about the perfect heart. What is it exactly that constitutes the perfect heart? Is it that it is perfectly symmetrical? Is it the size? Is it the shape? The color? Who is it that defines 'perfect' anyway and why am I so obsessed with it?
Pondering these questions I realized that the same could be asked about our hearts. Our real hearts. I, like many others, am in the dating phase of life. The phase where my main focus is to date, find the one I'm supposed to marry and start a family. On our individual quests for a mate, I think we often get caught up with finding the one with a perfect heart. But again, I ask, what is it that constitutes the perfect heart? Is it one that is always happy and never sad? Is it one that is never angry or conflicted? Or is it one that will always beat to the same time and tune as mine? If any of us are so inclined to think that the answer to any of these should be yes, then I am inclined to think that the perfect heart does not exist. Imperfection is in our very nature and we all struggle with various imperfections on a daily basis. A search for the perfect heart would be a hypocritical one.
I must recognize my own imperfections (like my inability to draw a perfect heart) while searching for a heart that will be a companion to mine. We must all recognize our own and as we do so we will be more willing to accept those of others'. Tonight I realized that a flawless, perfect heart is not what I should look for but one that tries his best. One that seeks after the right things and works hard despite all the imperfections. And most of all, one who can accept both of my imperfect hearts; the one inside of me and the one on my doodling paper.
No comments:
Post a Comment